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les marteaux 7:44 Sat Aug 30
New Limerick Thread

Same as before

The football we play to be blunt
Is to most West Ham fans an affront

arsene york-hunt 11:49 Sat Apr 27
Re: New Limerick Thread

While holding her bum cheeks apart.
The girl did a very loud fart,
Between me and you
Not the thing you do,
While attending the d'Oyly Carte.

A new hairstyle with a fringe,
Was how she adorned her minge

Mike Oxsaw 7:40 Sat Apr 27
Re: New Limerick Thread

Its 4.30 and I'm watching my team
Is it real or just a bad dream?
They huff and they toil,
Yet they're still off the boil,
And clearly have run out of steam.

While holding her bum cheeks apart.
The girl did a very loud fart

arsene york-hunt 7:31 Sat Apr 27
Re: New Limerick Thread

Its 4.30 and I'm watching my team
Is it real or just a bad dream?
Win lose or draw,
We are always a bore
Moyes sacking's our wish it would seem.

A new hairstyle with a fringe,
Was how she adorned her minge.

Hello Mrs. Jones 5:11 Sat Apr 27
Re: New Limerick Thread

A flash little twat called Robbie
Spurs supporter, very gobby
His trips to the Lane
Often ended in pain
A perpetually trophy-less hobby

Its 4.30 and I'm watching my team
Is it real or just a bad dream?

Helmut Shown 11:50 Fri Apr 26
Re: New Limerick Thread

A French bird who lived down my street
Had a bush that went down to her feet
But through the great thatch
Parts of her snatch
Poked out giving suitors a treat

A flash little twat called Robbie
Spurs supporter, very gobby

Helmut Shown 11:43 Fri Apr 26
Re: New Limerick Thread

There was a young Frenchman from Rheims,
Abducted by aliens it seems
He was kept alive
By his will to survive
And a packet of Peake's custard creams

A flash little twat called Robbie
Spurs supporter and very gobby

BRANDED 8:11 Fri Apr 26
Re: New Limerick Thread

I made it to the loo in a hurry
Which I'll blame on the dodgy prawn curry
I tried to curl one
but ended up hurling
due to the stench of the slurry

A French bird who lived down my street
Had a bush that went down to her feet

Hello Mrs. Jones 7:40 Fri Apr 26
Re: New Limerick Thread

Liverpool fans, two types, both scumbags,
The real scouse cunts, and plastic slags
If you go there perhaps
They'll nick your hub caps
This right bunch of northern scallywags

I made it to the loo in a hurry
Which I'll blame on the dodgy prawn curry

arsene york-hunt 3:32 Fri Apr 26
Re: New Limerick Thread

That Yank country singer, Travis Tritt
Is known to drone on quite a bit,
I'd to google him,
He looks a right quim,
And no doubt his music is shit.

Liverpool fans, two types, both scumbags,
The real scouse cunts, and plastic slags

Mike Oxsaw 12:07 Fri Apr 26
Re: New Limerick Thread

There was a young Frenchman from Rheims,
Abducted by aliens it seems.
They prodded and probed,
Then left him on the road
Just thinking it one of "those" dreams.

That Yank country singer, Travis Tritt
Is known to drone on quite a bit

arsene york-hunt 9:48 Thu Apr 25
Re: New Limerick Thread

Two trannies one cup and a fool
Contested the meaning of tool,
"Of course now modern chicks,
Can now have big hairy pricks,
It's Nicola Sturgeon's new rule."

There was a young Frenchman from Rheims,
Abducted by aliens it seems.

BRANDED 6:41 Thu Apr 25
Re: New Limerick Thread

At a party I met an old slapper
And gave her one over the crapper
a big floating turd
was promptly preferred
to my offer of an anal malacka

Two trannies one cup and a fool
Contested the meaning of tool

Hello Mrs. Jones 6:27 Thu Apr 25
Re: New Limerick Thread

How, why it happened is abstruse
Those fucking mad horses let loose
The reason was that
Some bestial twat
Put his dick up their equine caboose

At a party I met an old slapper
And gave her one over the crapper

arsene york-hunt 3:58 Thu Apr 25
Re: New Limerick Thread

I like a good wine with a meal,
But my partner just barks...like a seal.
With drink I am iffy,
And can't get a stiffy
It just flops around like an eel.

How, why it happened is abstruse
Those fucking mad horses let loose,

Mike Oxsaw 11:21 Tue Apr 23
Re: New Limerick Thread

In a packed lift, a young bloke called Bart.
Did a loud and smelly horse 'n' cart.
Before the next floor,
He did several more
Which caused people's eyeballs to smart.

I like a good wine with a meal,
But my partner just barks...like a seal.

arsene york-hunt 10:14 Tue Apr 23
Re: New Limerick Thread

There was a young man from Crewe
Had the shits through drinking home brew,
The uncontrolled faeces
Fluid and small pieces,
Soiled his pants, vest and shirt tail too.

In a packed lift, a young bloke called Bart.
Did a loud and smelly horse 'n' cart.

Helmut Shown 4:48 Tue Apr 23
Re: New Limerick Thread

A young lady was feeling quite brash,
Through the window she exposed her gash.
She inserted her thumb
It was dripping with cum
Typical scouser white trash

There was a young man from Crewe
Had the shits through drinking home brew

arsene york-hunt 2:19 Mon Apr 22
Re: New Limerick Thread

He walked in with only one sock
The other was hard as a rock,
Used it to wipe his bum,
And when wanking, his cum,
In a low class hotel in bangkok.

A young lady was feeling quite brash,
Through the window she exposed her gash.

Helmut Shown 9:49 Sun Apr 21
Re: New Limerick Thread

In porn is there no other place
To cum but right in her face
She may give a frown
If your mates hold her down
She’ll think that you’re lacking in grace

He walked in with only one sock
The other was hard as a rock

Hello Mrs. Jones 6:02 Sun Apr 21
Re: New Limerick Thread

A flight attendant on Emirates,
Dropped her drawers on a flight to the States
I was met with a snub
To join the Mile High Club
Much to the fun of my mates

In porn is there no other place
To cum but right in her face

arsene york-hunt 4:10 Sun Apr 21
Re: New Limerick Thread

A Chinese man fron Hong Kong
Wished that his penis was long,
The size of his dick,
Made him feel quite sick
His friends all called him Mousey Dong.

A flight attendant on Emirates,
Dropped her drawers on a flight to the States

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